Excuse me.

We've been a tad busy of late, hence the silence around these parts. After a glorious weekend watching some of our besties get hitched in the bayous of Louisiana, it was back to the grind. Just so you feel in the loop, here's what my to-do list has looked like this week:

- train replacement at work

- finish work

- Chest XRay

- House closing, Wed @ 9 am

- EKG

- pack totes to be sent East, completed by Friday

- determine which artifacts to be sent to which parents

- HIV/Syphilis test (not even kidding, necessary for visa)

- Sign our newly created will & power of attorney directives

- laugh at my husbands partially shaved chest from his EKG

- pack suitcases for farewell tour of the south

- receive and distribute the 500 prayer magnets received in the mail

- and on . . .

- and on . . .

- and on . . .

Thankfully there has been only one melt-down this week from sheer exhaustion, and let's just say it was such an ugly cry that Baxter just put his hands on his knees and laughed. It was that bad/good. I love being ridiculous.

Think of us as we pack up our lives and drive off into the sunset on Friday. Hopefully the few weeks ahead before take off will be a little slower paced . . . and if not, it's a long flight, and we can sleep then, right?

And again with the overwhelmed.

Well, it was bound to happen. The tears must come, and come they have. It is surreal to be staring down our final two weeks here, in this season, and in this place. As I mentioned before, God has been so, SO good to us - meeting us in ways and places we least expected it.

Last night was our end of the year ESL fiesta, which equals awards, gifts, muy delicioso comida, and yes, tears from yours truly. Baxter and I have come to truly love our students, and the way they loved us last night was an unforgettable gift.

I love how the Lord works, when you give of yourself - even in ways that feel inadequate and sometimes half-hearted - you are one who walks away blessed, so much more so than those you went to serve. So many Tuesday nights I felt like there was more I could have done . . . taught better, been available more. But last night I was struck with the truth that the Lord loves the widow's willingly given pennies . . . and that even in what we might consider to be not enough, He pours out grace over and above.

I love this picture, for reasons deeper than the obvious cultural differences of what you do when a photo is being taken.

I love it because Ramon is so proud of his certificate, and is becoming a citizen on FRIDAY, and was able to take and pass his citizenship test in ENGLISH.

I love it because Jose Luis is about to be the father of a baby girl, and he is giddy with gratitude that the Lord would bless them with another baby.

I love it because Blanca and I's eyes are still wet with tears, sad to be leaving a sweet friendship, but confident in her ability to walk with her daughter through school in the coming years.

I love it because it gives me hope . . . hope that the Lord can love us, use us, and change us in an unfamiliar place. Hope in knowing that He meets us smack dab in the middle of our inability and inadequacy, and chooses to pour out all of His goodness anyways.

I think I needed tonight. I needed to be reminded to let those ole' floodgates open, so that I don't miss a second of God's outpouring for the sake of appearing "together". God has been so richly present these days, and I don't want to miss a second of it or deny Him the glory. HE has been good, HE has been gracious, and HE deserves to be worshiped.

Gracias a Dios.

Full to the Brim.

Grateful.

Hopeful.

Joyful.

These describe my feelings at this exact moment. (Sunburned is in there too, but that's beside the point).

This morning Baxter and I had the joy of standing before our church body, and sharing with them the wild ride God has had us on through today - one month away from leaving this side of the world to plant our lives on the other.

We had the privilege of being challenged by a dear, dear friend to say "yes" to whatever God might have for us, so that as a church we are obedient to finishing the task well, and as individuals we may live for the purpose God created us.

We were blessed as fellow church members came through a line, committing to go with us in spirit and in prayer, asking God how their "yes" might partner them with us.

We were challenged to hear these same church members say things like "I want to do what I can financially to help. It's not much, but it's what God would have me do".

I am so overcome with joy and gratitude for this body. . . and how one tiny muscle behind my left ear can hurt so bad from holding back tears the better part of the morning.

Who would have thought that a church - 2o miles from no where, full of cattle ranchers and farmers - would so deeply shape and share our calling? Who would have thought that the Lord would allow our lives to intersect with such authentic, passionate believers in such a way that we would be forever changed?

It seems almost inadequate and cliche to say God is good, but there is no other way to explain the fullness of my soul right now.

God is so undeniably good, and we are unquestionably undeserving.

Excuse me while I preach to myself.

Well, it's here. The torrent of lists, packing, and general madness has unequivocally arrived. I've realized that the pace of our lives right now is far from slowing down, and that since the intensity will not change, my perspective must. My modus operandi in times of madness like these typically looks like the following:

1. put your head down and power through, dominating any and every list in a continental radius
2. look up just long enough to feel completely inept and overwhelmed
3. commence melt down
4. attempt to blame feelings in #2 and #3 on innocent bystander, most frequently and unfortunately = hubby
5. make yourself sick from lack of sleep, unnecessary worry, and delusions that you had any control over your life to begin with

Well, thankfully(?) we've already covered the above ground this past week. And seeing as how we are still many days, lists, and events away from the big move, I've decided things have got to change, and I highly doubt my beloved would disagree. Here are the things on which I am setting my mind:

1. Each day I will accept as a gift, in which I have the opportunity to treasure the people and places God has in front of me - right here, and right now.
2. Every moment is a chance for me to pour back all that has been given to me in this season of our lives - and is purposefully intended by our Creator.
3. Regardless of lists, appointments, and things to be done - our (ONE-WAY!!) tickets are purchased. We have seats on a plane, that will land us on another side of the globe regardless of what I do or do not get done.
4. God, in His infinite, matchless mercy - has allowed me such a time as this, as a gift and an essential piece of what is next.

(I don't know about you, but I already feel better. ) Something I also know about myself, is that I am no good at transitions whatsoever. I would highly prefer the band aid approach to changes in life - let's decide, and LET'S DO IT, preferably ASAP. It's much simpler, right? The in between, any sadness or pain - is supposedly momentary that way. Clearly, few things in life are that simple or easy. Times of transition make me antsy. Not from boredom, heavens no, but from readiness. Ready to go, do, and be in a new place. Ready to move past difficult goodbyes and painful transitions.

As I have been thinking about this, I think of the countless instances in both scripture and our own lives that are seldom as quick or painless as the band-aid method. Wandering Israelites, dazed and confused disciples in the wake of Jesus' death and later ascension - these days of waiting were ordained by God to teach His people trust, obedience, and longing. The in-between times - while challenging, fraught with excitement and even worry, are GOOD. They are NECESSARY, so that we are most fully as God intended.

This is the truth I am clinging to these days. That while I would rather just take off and start running towards the Far East, its not time yet. I still need to be shaped by those around me, I still need to hug my mama, I still need to laugh with my friends. Not only for them, but for me. I am still being formed, not yet ready to walk into whats ahead. And although I don't relish the awkwardness of being in between, I don't want to miss out on these kind of moments.


Or these kinds of friends.

So as you think about it, pray for us. Pray that our hearts would be content to press on, headfirst into the challenges of the in-between. Pray that we would finish WELL - loving fully those who mean so much to us. Pray that as so many things demand our attention, that our hearts would remain steadfast, wholly set on He who sustains.

Game ON.

And to think I thought I was tired and busy last week. The whole "moving to another country next month" thing has gone into FULL SWING. Just yesterday I had two of my three doctor's appointments for the week (don't worry - I do not have the bacillary dysentery or scarlet fever the government of our new country is concerned about, these are just check ups), went to work, went to a meeting at church, spoke to the youth, and got up at 6 to do it all over again today. So in light of all of this, here is a pictorial display of the highlights of our past week:

The rose bushes in our front yard burst forth with FIVE of these beauties, which Baxter felt we should document for the sake of posterity.


I decided dealing with whole chickens was a valuable skill to acquire pre-move, so I went for it . . . kind of. I got squeamish and couldn't stick my hand in "there" to get out the inside stuff. I panicked, called Mom, and then decided to just leave all those parts alone. Who needs 'em? After overcoming the moment of potential upchuck, I pressed on, and it turned out DELISH!


And moving on to the only slightly more interesting news, we have officially begun to deconstruct our sweet home. This pic is from our cleaning out of the office last weekend. We now have piles, pictures and other mementos designated for specific parental units. Mom, Dad, Leon, Sandra - you're welcome.


And in similar news, the Bentley Publicity tour 2k10 has officially begun. This cutie in his native dress below was on his way to Kidzone at our church, where we both had the pleasure and privilege of sharing what God is doing in our lives to 2nd-6th graders. It was so great to just stop and share our excitement about this next step in our lives. There is so much to DO right now - it was really nice to just stop and think about WHY.


Last night we spoke to the youth group at our church, which was a wonderful way to wrap up a crazy day. A highlight was when afterward a 15 year old gave her tithe to Baxter, saying "she wasn't a member anywhere right now, but just wanted to be obedient to what God was doing." (TEAR.) That and hearing a 9 year old pray that we wouldn't get malaria have been sweet moments this past week. We are so deeply grateful for our church body during this process, and to see kids and teenagers truly desire to partner with us in what God is doing - is a high and holy gift. We are tired, but richly blessed and deeply thankful.