Three things I bet didn't happen to you last week

1.) While teaching kindergarten at a Halloween party in the park last weekend, I noticed a kind older gentleman snapping away with his big wig camera. Not long after, he noticed me (token foreign teacher), and asked if I would mind if he took my picture. Sure, I thought, no problem. Not the first time. But then he handed me his brown poodle, and I realized he meant WITH his dog.

10 minutes of snapping and face-licking later, I wasn't sure if I should be flattered or offended.

2.) On Sunday at one of the aforementioned parties, one of the tiny party goers looked up at me and said she needed to pee. Knowing her parents weren't there to escort her, I asked where the nearest bathroom was. It was a floor above us, so we quickly made our way towards the stairs. Once in the stairwell, little bit says again she has to pee, and before I can fully turn my head she's got her pants down and is squatting in the corner of the stairwell. Unfortunately, my inner westerner kicked in (thinking it was NOT ok for her to tee tee in the corner of the stairs, when in actuality it was the best and perhaps more familiar option) and I quickly swooped her up with one arm, pulling up her tiny pants with the other, and bounding up the stairs two at a time.

After running around the hallway desperately searching for the right apartment we reached the bathroom and I set her down by the toilet. She simply looked at me and said in Chinese "My pants are wet." Yep. So is my right arm kiddo, so is my right arm.

3.) While out doing a hygiene training in local villages last week, we were taken to dinner by the principal of the primary school we had been in that day. As the meal wrapped up I made my way to the restroom, and per usual, was greeting by a row of squatty potties. What was somewhat different however, was that this particular row of squatties was on a small raised platform, and the tank of the commode was on the floor instead of mounted to the wall. Forgetting this as I dropped my pants to do my business, my butt solidly whapped the top of the tank sending me flying face forward, pants wrapping my ankles to the cold *wet* tile several inches below. Thankfully I caught myself with my hands rather than my face, but in the process managed to take the trashcan full of *used* toilet paper down with me. As I picked myself up from the littered floor, I noticed a nice long scrape down my shin not unlike this one:

So. What did you do last weekend?